Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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