What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
FYI... At my funeral, it will be your job to throw yourself dramatically onto my casket.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
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