My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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