So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
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