"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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