I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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