Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
Randomize