My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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