Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
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