If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
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