LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
Honey you are a beautiful woman but I came over to eat your pizza and fuck your brother. And you're out of pizza.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
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