TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
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You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
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There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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