this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize