you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
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