pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
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His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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