i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize