at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a school picture of an 8 year old boy in my pocket...?
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
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