There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Boobs speak an international language.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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