He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
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The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
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Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
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