So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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