can we get nightvision for the apartment?
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize