I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
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