yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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