what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
so I just realized.. of my 70k student loan debt, most of it went toward bar tabs, eightballs, and sweet-ass ties to wear to gamedays and other people's weddings. I think about shit like this while I'm at my mid-level management position. you know. "working."
Look upon your future, America, and despair.
Randomize