epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
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