After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
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