Pappa wants mamma naked
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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