I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize