ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
i think if a sober person was watching us they would have not thought we were witty
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize