she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
You left me with 12 red bulls and a bottle of vodka. What did you expect?
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