Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
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