sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
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