I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
This strange Italian man told me he wants to take me for ice cream and kept calling me "tomato" from tinder
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
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