he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Randomize