Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
No subtext here. People are naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I just bought a butt plug on Amazon prime day and you're the only person I felt would appreciate that decision
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
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