hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
So doing the math I dated almost 2 of me in penises. Like, if I you layed them out lengthwise it would be 2 times my height.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize