Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
Randomize