Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
You ruined the universe
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize