I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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