this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize