I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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