shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
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