do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
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I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
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We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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