I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize