I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
Randomize