wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I just rubbed my dick on something in your apartment. Can you guess what?
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
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