My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
I'm at the local community college pretending to be a substitute for a computer applications class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
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