dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Maybe we should invest in one and when one of us wishes to be a hot mess in a wheel chair the other one will push the mess around to wherever it wants to go.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
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