the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize