I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize